Unwind the Mind....

Marriages are made in Heaven

2011-03-11T12:09:00.012+05:30

Grown-ups, the movies, books, music everything and everybody tells you the same thing - Marriages are made in Heaven!

However, while we're playing the field, we tend to forget that and have the confidence of shaping our own destiny and every date which lasts more than the 3rd meeting seems to be a serious fling.

Now here's the thing, once you get serious about a person...you might think the world of him and try and shape your moves in a way which might work for the two of you. The moment we find someone who shares our interests and has the same sense of humor we think of taking it to the next level.

What we discount is the Hand of God.

And now looking back at my own life and even my friends, the old adage stands true. God has a way of shaping one's life and relationships in a way that we end up with the one we were supposed to be with.

.....maybe its best to call some people your friends than spouse :P

Sleep !!!!!!

2010-06-30T13:58:00.002+05:30

ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz

Indian Law : Anarchic or Applicable ???

2010-06-23T15:48:00.010+05:30

Webster’s dictionary defines LAW as ‘a binding custom or practice of a community: a rule of conduct or action prescribed or formally recognized as binding or enforced by a controlling authority’.

The key words here being the ‘binding custom or practise of a community’.

What a community does or practises is dynamic in nature and generally changes with every alternate generation. So, if it was not ok for your grand-dad n grand-mom to date, it is a way of life for your generation.

And there are loads of other examples I can shell out to highlight the ever changing society. Now, if the way a community practises a custom changes does it warrant for a change in the law as well.

There might be an argument that laws are made keeping in mind the ever changing needs of the society & they outline the basic framework within which a society should work. The argument is very valid and stands ground as one cannot keep changing the laws every second decade.

However, when a decade becomes a century & we find that human-kind has made advances of the nature that one cannot even dream of then I would say is a good time to re-visit the ‘binding customs of a community’

The basic framework within which society operated a century ago does not exist even in the rural areas. Women are no more bound to the kitchen stove & men are no longer the sole bread earners of the family. Work hours are no longer limited to 9-5; families have gone from joint to nuclear; people have moved on from arranged marriages to live-in relationships; a bicycle per household has transformed into a car per family member.

Education has opened up new avenues and people have started thinking on a different tangent.

Now, amongst all these if someone was to tell you that it is legally ok to get married at the age of 21, however, it is not legal to drink till you’re 25, you’ll probably blow your top off.

A case in point will be judiciary’s decision to recognize live-in relationships & grant marital rights to women.

In today’s world it has become imperative that the laws are in accordance to the times we are living in or else they will become redundant. The lawmakers have to be farsighted to put things in perspective in terms of striking a balance between the ‘binding customs & changing needs of the community’.

Introspection : Poor Road Infrastructure

2010-06-09T21:40:00.007+05:30

The blog below is a comment on the article : http://www.9newz.com/here-start-your-day-with-a-laugh

The article has very correctly highlighted all the factors that go in making Indian roads a death trap. And after suffering a huge personal loss to the Indian roads my views are anything but biased.

All the questions raised about the reasons for lack of road infrastructure & policing are answered in the article itself when the author points out "It is not that we lack laws. What is really lacking is an organizational will to upgrade traffic infrastructure, and an official will to strictly impose those laws".

We have all dewelled far too long on the factors that go in making our roads a highway to hell ; it about time we stop & think of why we are not able to remove those roadblocks which are stopping us in having a road infrastructure second to none.

What we need to understand is that the root cause of all these problems is the corruption rot in the society at all levels & complete disregard for the laws, bylaws & whatever guidelines might be issued by the govt. authorities/departments. This coupled with no value for human life makes a deadly cocktail of poor road infrastructure which is responsible for the rising no. of road accidents.

We as a society need to start valuing human life & fear the law and only then we can see some changes across the board & hopefully we will be able to bring the graph for road deaths downwards.

In the present scenario, right from the institutes planning the roads (city as well as highways) to the contractors building it to the people responsible to regulate it, no one is (1) afraid of the law catching them cause of their lack of diligence and (2) cares for the value of human lives lost due to their negligence as long as their pockets get deep.

A recent RTI has highlighted the rot in our system by bringing to light a case of corruption in a state govt. where a tender was raised to build a highway, the contract running in millions was awarded to a pvt construction firm & even after a decade there was no sign of any construction let alone a highway. As if this was not enough, another tender was raised a decade later to paint the highway (which was never built in the first place) & it was awarded to a pvt. contractor as well !!!!!!!

When we dare to compare ourselves to developed & rising economies, the first thing we need to compare is the level of corruption that runs within the system (http://www.business-standard.com/india/news/india-ranked-84th-in-corruption-index/376796/) & there needs to be some serious introspection within the bureaucracy & the civil society.

Hence, it is imperative for us as a society to make a radical change in our mindset & move from the 'sab chalta hai' attitude to one where every one (govt. / pvt agencies) are accountable for their deeds & also, we get the will to execute the offenders in the most gruesomest of manners irrespective of the financial / political standing of the offender.

Civil Disorder or Terrorism

2010-05-19T17:48:00.003+05:30

Civil disorder, also known as civil unrest or civil strife, is a broad term that is typically used by law enforcement to describe one or more forms of disturbance caused by a group of people. Civil disturbance is typically a symptom of, and a form of protest against, major socio-political problems; the severity of the action coincides with public expression(s) of displeasure.

Terrorism : The unlawful use or threatened use of force or violence by a person or an organized group against people or property with the intention of intimidating or coercing societies or governments, often for ideological or political reasons.

There is a very thin line between the two.

And, in my personal opinion any civil disorder, irrespective of the motive it started out for, the moment it starts killing innocent civilians at will in a show of strength takes the form of a Terrorist Movement.

Now, there is an argument on the basis of Human Rights for these so called protesters not to be branded as terrorists. So there has to be a distinction made between someone who protests for his rights & someone who kills in protest for his rights. And, I don't think the difference stated is too complex for the so-called Human Rights activists to decipher.

Now, lets focus on the role State has to play in dealing with the two. Military action is the logical answer to counter terrorism; however that might not be a feasible option to counter civil unrest.

So, that takes us back to the moot question of when does a civil disorder crosses the line and becomes a terror threat which can be dealt with accordingly.

As viscous a circle as it might be, it is imperative for us to find an unanimous answer to that and the way it should be dealt with. For it is not fair to the normal civilians & the poor security personnel who are killed by people on the pretext of civil unrest to cite Human Rights as an excuse to not brand civil disorder as a terrorist movement.

EGO minus E !!!

2010-05-14T16:03:00.003+05:30

Bend, bend till you break. That is the problem within most relationships these days. No matter what you do and no matter how hard you try, your partner will still find one reason or the other to nag you and push you to the limits.

And the worst part is that after all this they still feel as if they haven’t committed any sin, and it’s all your fault & you yourself have taken yourself to the edge.

Now, all this is not about who is right and who is wrong, in principle it’s about whether a person should feel compelled to do certain things in a relationship or not. And, even if one is doing something out of pressure then is the other justified in questioning the motive furthermore. The least one can do is be quiet if not say anything positive.

So, what it all basically boils down to is EGO. This 3 letter word, however small it might be, packs a BIG punch and delivers an even bigger one. This word is the key to success or failure of any relationship. The presence of this word is directly co-relational to the amount of discord in a relationship.

Now, what one has also got to realise is that there are 2 kinds of EGOs. One is the EGO we consciously show and then there is an EGO which comes into play sub-consciously. There have been many a time when one does things not because one wants to, but his sub-conscious ego keeps blowing things out of proportion.

Hence, the challenge is not to suppress & get rid of your conscious EGO as that is very easy, but it is totally another thing to not let your sub-conscious EGO rule your mind/actions. And the very fact that it is sub-conscious makes it all the more difficult for one to master it. And that very fact also makes it imperative for one to be calm and kill the EGO which makes one do/say things one might not want to.

And last but not the least; do unto others as you would have others do unto you.

The sooner we realise the full potential of these words and imply these rigorously in our relationships, the world & the relationship would be a more peaceful place to live in.

HAPPINESS

2009-09-18T00:36:00.029+05:30

hap·pi·ness
1 : a state of well-being and contentment

Webster Dictionary describes Happiness as a state of well being & contentment.

The 2 words "well being" & "contentment" are very relative terms. How & When, a person is in a state of well being or contentment is something which is very subjective to each individual.

Some might argue that getting material comforts like a car, or a security of one's own house, or even a huge bank balance may constitute as a state of well being and hence making an individual happy. Others may say that instead of running after materialistic pleasures, one should focus his energies towards helping others and people who are in need rather than acquiring wealth for oneself.

For some though, a person might be such an integral part of their lives that their being in state of well being or even contentment is linked to that one particular person. No matter if you acquire personal assets for yourself or if you go around doing charity, as long as you can share it with that one important person in your life, you feel happiness; not coz of the things you did, but coz you were able to share those things with that person. Hence, that person is a very integral part of you feeling happiness and thus contentment in your life.

But, what if that person suddenly goes away, to another world, where one doesn't have any physical contact with him. One might still interact spiritually with him, but one cannot physically share one's newly acquired material comforts with him, then how can one be in a state of well being despite having everything. One might help others in an effort to soothe oneself from the pain, but at the end of the day, at the bottom of the heart, one knows that the void cannot be filled by any such actions.

The human nature is such, that all our lives, we give tangibles more importance than something which we cannot see or touch; human body being one of them.

A human feels more content and happy being physically around one's loved ones than being away from them, even if he is given the security of their being there. Physical presence of our loved ones is something which we all crave for and nothing seems to be complete without that important person being physically present.

Then if one's happiness is so intricately woven with the physical presence of that person, then how can one be in a state of happiness sans that person???

No matter what I buy, acquire, do or don't do in life, no matter how hard I laugh or how long I cry; I can never be happy from within just because that one integral person of my life will never be there physically to share the rest of my life.

"Appu" -- the name will always live in my heart n soul and I will now try to reach beyond my craving for his physical presence and try to make peace with myself by looking for him in my soul and in the heavens above.

For now I know that my life ahead is going to be a long & lonely road without him as nobody, be it family, spouse or friends, can fill the void created by him leaving.

F.R.I.E.N.D.S

2009-03-02T11:14:00.005+05:30

A friend in need is a friend indeed.

This is an age old saying that still holds true. Although, what this saying does is refines your friend circle and leaves just about a couple of names in your "best friends" list.

One comes across a lot of people from all walks of life in his lifetime. Yet there are a few who stay as friends and fewer who stay as best buds for life.

The most dangerous of enemies have been the best of friends once.

A best friend is someone who knows you inside out, thus compromising the armour you put up for the world. A best friend is someone you don't feel scared while letting him in on your dirtiest of secrets or confiding the most important of things to him.

Thus, a person is more vulnerable in front of his best friends more than anyone else in the world.

Also, a person has only 2 support systems (in the said order):
a:Family
b:Friends

One might argue that true friendship doesn't always mean bending down for the other person or taking shit......at the same time one only bends down or takes shit from his true friends only.

And if at any given point of time you feel that you wanna opt out of the friendship, it is necessary to let the other person know the reason and exit with a clear head than with a clouded mind.

I'll end off by saying that diamonds may be forever (for girls) but for us men our true friends are forever.

Professional Hazards

2009-02-16T14:13:00.008+05:30

What is right for one might be wrong for the other and vice-versa.

I don't know of many men who will like to see their wives, fiances, going out with other men, most of all on "official trips".

Now, working in the competitive times that we are in, one cannot afford the luxury of saying no to one's seniors. Moreover, its also not professional to cite such reasons for declining official work.

However, going out with a male colleague, that too with one who possess a little flirtatious streak, might not go down too well with the bfs and husbands of certain women.

The point is not of getting insecure about the relationship, its a very simple thing of not being able to see your girl with some other guy, be it at any level.

Now, one might be called close minded for sticking to such beliefs and thought process but its a human thing.

A girl would only understand this, if and only if she is NOT career minded.

Like mentioned earlier, its not about insecurity in the relationship or getting jealous seeing your better half climb the corporate ladder; its all about the blood boiling at the mention of your better half's name with some other guy.

At this time, we can bring the argument in that if a guy can go out on a sales call or a meeting with a female colleague then why cant a gal do the same. The reason is very simple that all men are have only one thing on their mind. Its a bitter truth but its the truth.

Again, at the risk of being called close minded, the only solution out is either the girl makes it clear at her workplace about her priorities (which one cannot afford in today's competitive work culture) or look for a less exciting job which does not come with such professional hazards.

A man can change his views only if the objection was out of jealousy or insecurity, but if his objections arise out of his feelings for the girl then it'll be really hard for him to change his stance.

I'll end it with the same line that i started it all off with:

What is right for one might be wrong for the other and vice-versa.

Aakash Maindwal --- A tribute

2009-01-27T16:02:00.010+05:30

Aakash; literally meaning the sky, he was my fav. cousin and the person closest to me. At 26, he left us all and went to the heavens above.

That fatal night of 7th Jan 09, he was driving back from his office meeting and on the way back, he was blinded by the lights of an oncoming speeding bus and had a fatal crash. The poor guy died on the spot. The bus, being driven by a minor without a valid license, was speeding on the wrong side, and due to no fault of his my beloved brother lost his life.

He had got engaged just a month back on 9th Nov. '08, and was planning his wedding.

This is a rude shock that no one can explain or justify. We used to plan everything together and to now think that one vital part of my life is no longer there makes me feel incapacitated.

He grew up in Ranchi, and used to visit us in his summer vacations. We got close when we were in the 6th standard. One fine day after playing in the garden, we were siting and discussing stuff; and that time we decided that from now on we would share everything with each other, no secrets, and would plan everything together.

And to this day, we had stuck by that pledge, when God decided to snatch him away from me without any reason.

I've had a similar accident; in 2003, but i survived, then why couldnt he???

Where is the logic of a young, positive, charming, dynamic, person all of 26yrs of age, leaving this world???

Trust

2008-12-06T16:49:00.012+05:30

Trust; a word that is full of power, a word that embodies confidence.

Take the first alphabet out of it and you're left with:

Rust; a word that embodies fragility, weakness, gives one a feeling of powerlessness.

I dont think there can be more apt a way to describe the power TRUST has to keep a relationship strong.

Trust and Faith are two things that have have to be there in a relationship for it to flourish. They can even be called as pillars of a relationship.

Giving your partner gifts, coochie cooing, dinners, coffees, everything else fall flat on its face if one is not able to build trust in the relationship and in the partner as well. Some of these things might be argued as steps towards building that trust, however, the thing that plays the most important role in building trust is---HONESTY.

Honesty, can also be measured in terms of transperency. The more transparent one is, the more honest you are, and the most honest you are, more trust you build up.

Its all connected so deeply, that small small blots collected over a period of time can end up screwing your transperency, in effect your honesty, which in effect turns your trust into rust.

Building up anything takes time and a lot of effort, destroying it takes a minute. This holds true for trust as well.

Hence, it makes it imperative for us to to be brutually transparent to the other person, and clear out any doubts that may have appeared for whatever reason, because, 2-3 doubts clubbed togather can form cracks in the trust which you built over time.

And it's very difficult to mend those cracks then.

Shock nd Awe

2008-12-05T13:21:00.023+05:30

Everyone is going on and on about the terrorist attack in Mumbai on 26/11, what we are not focusing on is that it was more than a terror attack, it was urban warfare. It aint a simple case of terrorists coming and bombing up a hotel; its way beyond that.

The US Intelligence Agency, FBI, has officially stated that the level of sophistication seen is in the attack has never been seen in the sub-continent before. Inspite of us and the foreign agencies having solid proof of involvement from players across the border, be them state sponsored or not, we are doing absolutely nothing.

We have been hearing the rhetoric about bringing the criminals to justice for long now.

India is considered to be the next superpower of the world, and by the look of things outside terror, we are well on our way to be one.

We have the most sophisticated weapons and our forces are training alongside some of the best outfits in the world. There was a joint Navy excercise couple of months back with the Americans, Chinese and Russians participating. We have had our top Air Force pilots go train on US Air Force bases. The army troops posted on the border are equipped with some of the best of the best artillery available. All in all, we are a power in the sub continent and the world knows it.

However, what use if all this, if when attacked we keep siting and look at diplomatic ways of dealing with a war that took place in the financial capital of our country.

A week after war on Mumbai, all major airports have been put on high alert, top Indian commandos of NSG, CISF have been deployed all over. This is December, a month where people start enjoying the Delhi winters by having bonfires, shopping, eating out. Xmas is just around the corner, but the whole country, leave alone one state is gripped in fear, fear of terror, fear of not being able to defend ourselves.

Its about time that the establishment puts their foot down and say that we as Indians have had enough, and it's about time WE show the world what happens to people who try and mess with us.

Its about time we got the forces out on the border and declare war on the enemy.

Its about time we fight the forces trying to scare us in the open.

Its about time we SHOCK nd AWE the enemy.

Rush....

2008-09-06T02:23:00.003+05:30

The point of this post is to emphasize the importance of NOT rushing into anything.

What ones gotta understand is that there is a time and place for everything; and there is no point in rushing into stuff.....sometimes one might feel as if enough is enough and its about time to wrap things up and just do what needs to be done.....

....what ones gotta understand is that rushing into stuff only leads to probs later on....and only the person(s) concerned at that stage or in the situation are the best judges of when the time has arrived...their hearts and mind both will work in co-ordination at that point of time when the time arrives.

More often than not we tend to act on things impulsively, and that in turn sometimes makes us regret our decisions.....so its always better to wait and not rush into things.

Happy Independence Day!!!!

2008-08-15T13:36:00.006+05:30

HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!!!
15th August : National Holiday.
That is what it has become today.

I asked a couple of kids, who had just passed out of school and were planning how to celebrate their "freedom" from school, if the date 15th Aug. holds any importance for them.....the most vocal ans. i got was that its a national holiday and a day where they can chill or go on an out-station trip with their friends and families if it falls on a weekend.

Although, education does teach us about the freedom struggle of our country, what it does not teach us is to respect it and be thankful for the freedom we are enjoying.

It's a very sorry state of affairs and by the looks of it, I would not be surprised if by the time the next generation takes over, Independence Day will indeed "just" be a national holiday.

When I was growing up as a kid, we used to hear all these patriotic songs on radio...television...tapes....etc., D.D used to air patriotic movies, which at that time seemed endlessly boring to me, but now am realising how imp. and necessary they were.

But with the advent of cable, internet and a whole plethora of entertainment channels and avenues, all these patriotic songs, movies and stories seem to have been confined to the dusty shelves of time.

Even as I sit and write this blog....my playlist is shuffling the small collection of patriotic songs that I managed to download, but I wonder if the next generation will be listening to these songs or even have the respect for the freedom which we all seem to have taken for granted for now.

There has to be a national movement among the youth underlining not the freedom struggle, but the fact that we need to respect the freedom our freedom fighters have provided us with.

Beware Bachelors!!!

2008-07-11T14:36:00.004+05:30

Need i say anything more !!!
And if you don't believe this, then just google "international symbol of marriage".

FYI: The thing in man's hand is a credit card!!!

Hope...

2008-06-04T02:26:00.005+05:30

Dil na ummed tho nahi, naakam hi tho hai,
Lambi hai gham ki shaam, magar shaam hi tho hai,

yeh safar bahut hai katin magar,
Na udhas ho mere humsafar,

yeh sitam ki raat hai dhalne ko,
hai andhera gham ka pighalne ko,

Zara der ismein lage agar

Na Udhas ho mere humsafar,

Nahi rehnewaali yeh mushkile,
hai agle mood pe manzile,

meri baat ka tu yakeen kar

Na udhas ho mere humsafar,

Marriage--celebration or sacrifice ???

2008-05-28T14:48:00.005+05:30

They say that marriages are made in heaven and performed on Earth.

But what is marriage??

My mom says that it is not limited to the two individuals involved, but it is also the amalgamation of two families.

As long as 2 people are seeing each other; it is only them and their lives which are affected…..but when they decide to take the next step and tie the knot; there are a lot of other factors which come into play and family being one of the most imp. factor at hand.

Hence, it becomes imperative that both the families need to embrace each other with open hearts and minds; and even the guy and gal should have mutual respect and admiration for the other’s family.

And, God willing this is how it should ideally happen.

However, what does one do if he/she can’t get oneself to respect the other’s family?

Because, how I see it is that there is nothing more imp. than parents and family in one’s life. No matter what happens the one side you can count on for support are your parents.

At the same time, if you have decided that someone is the right person for you to even contemplate marriage, means that you have given it due thought and you strongly feel for that person and are sure that he/she might be the right one for you.

Marriage, again by def. can be termed as starting of a new life and a new family. And ideally a person is the most closest to his spouse; that means that if you have chosen a person to spend the rest of your life with then you do see yourself getting old with her and spending the best and worst phases of your life with her.

Hence, he/she becomes an imp. aspect of your life as well.

And we have already ascertained the fact that parents are an essential part of your being and their position can never ever be challenged.

Now, what if L.I.F.E decides to play a little game with you and brings you at a point where you not only have to make a decision but a life changing one at that.

When you know that you cannot and will not leave your parents for anything; then can you ask the other person to do just the opposite and come to you???

The ans. to this is pretty obvious.

So, that basically means that life has given you a choice with no choice.

At the risk of sounding a rebel against parents (which I honestly am not); the only question which I would like an answer to is:

If the two people involved don’t have an issue with each other; is it justified for them to part ways just because of a factor which is not even in their hands to control or change???

Crossroads...

2008-05-14T19:08:00.002+05:30

They say that the only thing permanent in life is...change!!!

It so happens that one tends to form a comfort zone around him after a certain period of time, be it in his personal or professional life.
And, while we are in this zone we are pretty much satisfied with whatever life doles out to us.

.....and then while we're sitting there comfortably in the zone, numb to everything else.....life happens and BOOM!!!

Before you know you are standing at a very important crossroad of your life; you can see 2 paths from where you are and both of them don't have any signboards to guide you.

Everyone, sometime or the other, sooner or later is bound to come at such a crossroad in life. What path you choose will determine how your life shapes up in the future.

So, now how does one decide which path to take???

It's been said that if you really want something then the universe conspires to get you to it. You just have to read the signals it gives you.

However, the signals sometimes might be so subtle that one might not be able to read them or one’s thought process might be clouded to see what the signals are.

And you cannot try and weigh the pros and cons at such a juncture because there might be a lot of unknown variables involved in it.

So, at the end of the day, you got to take a gamble and set out on one path and then work hard to make it work.

Timeline of Love.

2008-05-08T01:07:00.004+05:30

"Love at first sight, don’t rush into love, and love cant happen overnight", these are a few things that people generally say.

At the same time you will find people who will tell you that "Love at first sight", also exists.

There is a very fine line b/w liking someone and loving someone. The purpose of this post is not to define or analyze that line. All I can say is one’s heart is the best place to decide on what side of the line one stands on.

I am not going to define what the word Love mean, but I will try and look into the timeline of love.

Now, personally, I think that love at first sight is as big a piece of crap as any. However, it doesn’t mean that one needs to spend “n” no. of years in a relationship before finding out that he is in love.

Love is something that you will realize you’ve fallen into only after you have fallen into.

One might meet someone, sparks might fly and before even a week goes by, one realizes that he’s fallen head over heels.

Having said that, even a year or couple of years might pass by and you might not feel so sure about your partner yet.

The only conclusion I can come to is that one should go with the flow and let life take its own course and if love has to happen it will, could be in a week or could be in a few years.

The only important thing is to listen to your heart and read the signals ;)

Potty !!!!!!!!

2008-05-07T00:31:00.005+05:30

Potty, tatti, poo, shit, goo, call it whatever you want in whatever language, it still remains one of the most underestimated things in the world.

People want to do it but they don’t want to talk about it!!!!!!

Potty comes in diff. shapes, sizes, even diff. textures. Potty is directly related to what you eat and drink. Potty also mirrors what your stomach feels.

We tend to undermine potty so much that if it doesn’t come, then we feel so sick and start taking all kinds of medicines and herbs to make potty see the light of day. :P

A good potty session is really necessary for one to feel “light” and “relaxed”.

Doing potty after letting the pressure build up till you can hold it no more is the second best feeling in this world (we all know what the best feeling is). ;)

So, let’s all stand up raise our arms and say thanks to potty!!!

JAI POTTY BABA KI!!!!

I, Me, Myself !!!

2008-05-06T12:31:00.005+05:30

Present generation is accused to be too focused on themselves and their needs and wants. The general perception is that the overall outlook of a person is shrinking and is limited to “ME”.

Your parents or people closely involved in your life might have certain expectations out of you. And, the moment a person acts on his personal interests rather than others he is labeled as immature, selfish or too naive.

The gen. argument here would be that one needs to strike a balance b/w thinking only about oneself and taking into consideration the hopes and aspirations others might have of him.

However i think that there might be times where you need to decide what YOU really want, be it personally or professionally, and you go for it, even if it clashes with what everyone else might think.

Let others give you options, you evaluate those options, you evaluate what you want and then u choose and make a decision. And that decision should not be influenced by any other thing except your mind.

At the end of the day it’s your life and you will be held accountable for what you do with it.

A heavy heart....

2008-04-21T16:54:00.007+05:30

Chaar dinon ka pyaar ho rabba

Badi lambi judai, lambi judai!!!

I dont think there is nothing more to be said....these lines justify themselves very well.

Shattered Dreamz....

2008-04-11T14:58:00.005+05:30

Dreams are an integral part of our being.

We have loads of dreams, but we pick one and try and work hard towards it. People also like to term it as working towards your goal.

One can only set a goal for himself, if he has the power to dream what he wants and channelize his dream in a proper manner in order to realise it.

Depending on what you are working towards, it can take anywhere from weeks, to months, to years. The wicked thing however is, that the more time and energy one puts in it, the more one gets attached and involved in it with heart and soul. You start pacing your life according to the timeline you've set for the dream to realise, so that once it does, everything is in perfect order.

And then, after putting in a couple of years of hard work and manipulating one's life in accordance with the dream you worked so hard for.........POOF!!!

That last piece of the puzzle doesn't fall in place, and the whole picture comes crashing down. All the time and effort goes in vain, all your planning goes down the drain, and the life that you had built is suddenly of no value at all.

This, to me is the turning point in one's life.

Now, you've got to give in to the law of the land and work in accordance with the elements, because in order to tie the loose ends soon you gotta make do with what you have rather than what you want.

Although, in times like these one tends to loose faith in the very things he once sweared by, namely, dis quote:

"whatever happens, happens for good"

Amen!!!

Needs & Wants

2008-04-08T12:25:00.003+05:30

Need
• require (something) because it is essential or very important.

Want
• have a desire to possess or do; wish for.

All our life we are trying to fulfill our needs and wants. And sometimes there are things which we may not be able to classify, whether we want it or we need it.

A lot of factors have to be taken into consideration when one sits down to analyize what his needs and wants are. Factors like: money, family, prof. life, personal life, etc. etc. But, the wicked thing is that apart from family, all other factors are too dynamic in nature.

Hence, what may be our want today might become our need tommorow.

As a result, we're never satisfied and we're always in pursuit of something.

2 steps before the finish line...

2008-04-05T13:54:00.006+05:30

Life is a race....against time, people, things, your goals, etc. etc.

Someone somewhere is always counting time down to get what they've waited for so long. It could be anything...a job promotion, a new car, getting on the plane to meet your loved ones. So, that brings us to a situation where we actually are waiting for that "something special" to materialise. And i think its safe to say that patience is a key word while waiting for anything.

However, the most testing time of a wait period is right before the wait is going to end. We want to reach out and grasp that thing out of the air rather than sit and let it come to our hands. It may be worthwhile with some things and situations but there are a lot of times where a process needs to be in place for things to happen, and one has got to realise that we cannot mess up the process just because we're getting impatient waiting for it to complete.

Now, the thing with patiently waiting for something is that one needs a tonne of self control, which again is something that one can advocate to other people but when it comes to implementation not everyone is up to the task, and its perfectly fine too, coz afterall we are all humans.

But, i guess the one who can excercise self-control and show patience while waiting for the process to complete, will at the end of it all, be a content human being.

Encounters of the Third Kind.....

2008-01-19T01:16:00.003+05:30

Life....is a journey rather than a destination. And a long one at that.

This journey starts from the moment the doc slaps us on our butts for the air inflow to begin, to the time when God pulls the plug.

We come across millions n billions of people as we grow and walk through different phases of life. Some we remember, some we don't.

Of the ones we do remember, there are few who leave an imprint of their acquaintance forever on our minds. The image, the memory of those persons is etched forever. It could be a friend, a lover, a relative, or even a nobody who you bumped into at the subway or the airport lounge.

This brings me to the question that why is it that some people and some instances are always remembered by us or sub-consciously are at the back of our minds always???

Could there be a reason behind us meeting such people....is it because destiny wanted us to learn something from it or could it be that those people and instances were so special that our mind tends and wants to carry their thought forever.....

I guess, at the end of the day as long as you're getting a smile on your face whenever that name or instance crops up in your mind, thats what matters.

Words....

2007-08-06T12:45:00.000+05:30

it's only words
and words are all I have
to take your heart away ...

Doubt....two sides of the same coin

2007-07-27T22:48:00.000+05:30

Sometimes, a certain chain of events sparks off doubts in our minds....and what worsens it is the fact that we start assuming things without getting to know the other side of the story before basing our decisions or doubts....

The wicked part is that we all know that it is wrong but i guess it's human nature or ego that we don't take the first step n wait for the other person to come n explain his side of the story.

What we don't realise is that while we're waiting for the other person to come n explain his side of the story our mind is working overtime and making all kinds of assumptions as to what all could or would have gone wrong.

And more time the other person takes to explain himself the more we're convinced that either that person is not serious anymore or he is hiding something.

All these things as i said earlier are human nature or ego, no matter what u mite wanna call them and it's perfectly normal for one to behave like this....no issues at all....

However, the question that i ask is, is it really necessary for one to be accountable for every minute and give an explanation for all the chain of events, is the bond between two people not enuf to ans every question, the faith that two people mite have, is that not enuf ????

Rain...

2007-07-13T00:35:00.001+05:30

I jus had had to write this....

there is a heavy downpour outside n i'm siting in my room looking at the rain thru my balcony and enjoying the nice breeze caressing me and music playing games in my ears n mind ;)

Rain is such an amazing thing....

The smell of the wet soil....the trees look more greener...my car gets washed automatically, n i can have a bath too... in the open that is ;)

Rain to me is music, its life, its smiles, refreshing, happiness, everything good one can think bout.

The sad part is that the part of world where i live doesnt get to see rains that often....it's prob onli a week or two in a year with freak showers here n there....

I kno there are a lot of probs associated with persistent heavy rains, but hey, who wants to go there right now....let me njoi the rains while i can :D

So, amigos, adios!!!

Food

2007-07-10T03:48:00.000+05:30

EAT TO LIVE or LIVE TO EAT ???

Well this is something one needs to answer to himself.

And there IS a big difference b/w the two...considering that food is essential for life.

Lets explore the two a little bit.....if you eat to live, then you will pretty much be satisfied with whatever you get to feed yourself with as long as it is sufficing your hunger and not killing you.

However, people who live to eat are the real connoisseurs of food. Coz they are the people who will actually bother bout things as nifty as the presentation of the food, layout of the table, ambiance, etc etc. (obviously these things will not be nifty to them :P)

But the funny thing is, when one is super hungry....it does not matter whether he lives to eat or eats to live....all he wants is something edible that he can put in his mouth to quench that thirst for food!!!

And that's exactly what I'm feeling right now :(

What to do....

2007-07-05T20:54:00.000+05:30

Isn't it sensible to deal with the crack in the feel-good tunnel and make your way out, rather than falling into a big hole at the end of it...which can be seen from a distance???

I guess....this is a an age old question and if we start polling people on it....we're never gonna get one clear winner.

However, how i see it is that if one manages to get into a feel-good tunnel (which i mus say is a very rare thing in today's world) one is better off enjoying it n walking the walk rather than worry bout cracks in it or even the big hole at the end of it.

Reasoning to my thought process is that LIFE is a very dynamic and amazing thing....it has a habit of springing surprises at us and one can never ever be sure of how things mite turn out even as soon as 2-3-4 weeks from now.....let alone years n months....

so if i'm not sure of how things are gonna turn out....then why should i worry bout that hole right now....id rather cross the bridge when i come to it...and enjoy the time of my life that mite not come again....

......

2007-07-04T14:30:00.000+05:30

Jag ne cheena mujhse ....
mujhe jo bhi laga pyaraa....

It's said that Evil is there to make u realize bout God....
Bad is there to make u realize the good....

But why is that just when you find a diamond among the stones, you don't get to keep it for long....or rather i should say that I don't get to keep it.

And I'm not talking bout materialistic / tangible things.....what i want to hold on to is the intangible, but whenever i feel that i mite jus have stumbled across something amazing, something which comes your way only once in every 5-6years....LIFE just snatches it from me.

But after all these years....I have resigned to the fact that there HAS HAS to be a deep hole at the end of the feel-good tunnel where i will inevitably land up....its jus a "matter of time".

And honestly speaking, at this stage I'm just too tired to fight life and say that I CAN make the tables turn around....coz it jus does not happen.....atleast not with me....

I never wanted to get this word in my dictionary coz I think it is a very cowardly word to use...but i guess one can't live without it as well...

DESTINY....

PS: The title of this post "...." is dedicated to a friend.
Thank You for showing me a different part of me.

All by myself....

2007-06-27T02:34:00.000+05:30

I think of all the friends Ive known
But when I dial the telephone
Nobodys home...

I came home rather late tonight from work...around 1am.

It was not a day which I would like to relive again n again....coz since the time i woke up....

I had this strange feeling in me....it was a feeling as if im trying to fight a losing battle....

Initially i thought it will go away with time...but the weird thing is that it stayed with me the whole day and is still haunting me...ive just been this irritated person the whole day, shouting at people unnecessarily, getting pissed off with the regular things....in short i was just not me.

But why is that when you prob. need someone to jus speak with and desperately want to get it out of your system...they're not there...

It always happens by default....you might be spending hours speaking daily with a particular person...but just when you really really need to hear that voice...it's not there.

But then i guess that's what you call.....L.I.F.E!!!

Language of life...

2007-06-25T01:49:00.000+05:30

People say that music is the language of love...I'd like to take it a lil further and say that music is the language of life!!!

Music is something that can convey ne emotion u mite be going thru...

I am not a great scholar of music and I def. cant lecture on the do re mi fa sol of the music....but what i can vouch for is that you be in wotever situation, you will always find some kinda music or the other to comfort you...

Like a friend was telling me...that music is so integral to one's life (i.e if u allow it to be) that sometimes it ends up augmenting your thought process in certain situations. Now whether this is good or bad is another topic to be debated on another blog some other time. :P

For now, we'll just focus on the power of music and how it can soothe or excite your mood.

If I talk about myself, off late music has augmented my feelings so much that a stone hearted person like me feels like doing stupid nifty romantic things that I would generally laugh at, if i saw someone doing the same things.

I'm gonna shut up right now lest I jinx myself!!!

Butterflies in my stomach.....

2007-06-24T20:29:00.000+05:30

Creepy feeling in me.... shivers down my spine...is it coz of emptiness or fulfillment ???

I guess only time will answer it....

PS: I have to thank a friend who actually described my feelings to an accuracy which maybe even i wudnt hve been able to reach.

Stressbuster.....

2007-06-22T16:18:00.000+05:30

Speed....Racing.....weaving thru traffic.....

this is the best way to de-stress myself...

there is nothing better in this world than siting in ur car....alone.....pump up the volume and rev the engine.....hear the rpm's go up......engage the first gear.....let go of the clutch and floor the accelerator.....and zoooooooooooommmmmm ....ur away....

your head is pushed back as the seat sucks you in and your mind is purely on the road and traffic in front of you and devising ways to weave thru it...

and the best is when u take it on the highway......weaving thru trucks n the occasional racer that u mite come across....and by the time you're done......your mind and heart are free again.....free of all the tensions....all the confusion....all the uneasiness that you mite have......

so adios.....off i go.....

All out of love....

2007-06-21T21:35:00.000+05:30

I have this uneasiness in my heart.....i don't kno wot it is or whr did it come from....and the wicked part is that i have no clue how to deal with it....

Last time i felt such a thing many many years ago... i didnt react on it and im still regretting it.

And aftr all these years of burning my fingers one too many times....i kno for sure that this feeling is something i mite not get again...and yet life has played such a game that things are not in my hand this time around. I'm jus a mere spectator to life playing games with my heart.

All i can say to comfort my heart is...."Que sera sera"

however, like the cliché goes....its easier said than done....

I want to reach out and make things more certain and cement the feeling.....but this time around i cant take the first step even if i so want to.....

for the first time in my life im not afraid of commitment......and the super wicked thing is that there is nothing to commit to......

" Let the world around us just fall apart.
Maybe we can make it if we're heart to heart."

--Nothings gonna stop us now by Starship

the question is how strong is the "maybe" ???

Alone.......

2007-06-21T07:09:00.000+05:30

Loneliness is the kind of stuff that can break even the most optimistic n strong beings....

Many would counter by saying that it is the thing that they crave for and get peace when one is alone......but for how long???

There are times when in spite of having everyone around you....you feel alone....and those are the times when u want that someone to jus stand with you....the mere presence gives you this kind of assurance and strength to take on all the hardships this world mite throw on you.

At the end of the day, we all have to fight our own battles and walk the walk ourselves......

PS: I can write pages on this topic but I dont want to coz that will only end up in one sadistic post :P

Sleepless......

2007-06-15T03:11:00.001+05:30

Jaane kya baat hai.....

Jaane kya baat hai.....

Jaane kya baat hai....

Neend nahi aati.....badi lambi raat hai!!!!!!

Obligations.....

2007-06-09T11:43:00.000+05:30

If someone once helped you in the time of need.....so much so that you're indebted to him for the rest of your life....does it mean that you have to bear and hold on to the relationship even if over the years its been stretched to it's limits ???

n wot if the person is one of your family clan.....then i guess the answer becomes inevitable!!!!!!!

L.I.F.E. ............

Love or Lust.....

2007-06-07T11:43:00.000+05:30

Baby, show me what you feel
Come to me, show me somethin' real I need to know,
I need you completely

Love is takin' over, gotta let it in
Ooh and I need to feel the heart of you
I need to reach the very deepest part of you....

-- Can I touch you there (Michael Bolton)

Since childhood, when i was first introduced to the birds n bees, I have been thinking of what exactly is it that keeps the world revolving....is it money, is it love, or is it just lust.....be it lust for money, lust for love or lust for lust...the physical touch. And over a period of years, I have come to realize that money is something that everyone wants but one can live with or without it.

However, love is something that one desires to keep him going on. At some level within us, the feeling of knowing that someone, apart from your family, does love you probably gives you the strength to take on the world. But then, comes the key word of human existence, LUST. As we discussed earlier, lust could be for anything you feel strongly for.

As per the Oxford Dictionary:

lust

• noun 1 strong sexual desire. 2 a passionate desire for something

Now comes the interesting part, we all at some level or the other want and desire the physical touch of another human being. As humans, it is not just enuf for us to love someone, we want to get intimate with that someone as well. And I believe that physical intimacy is an integral part of completely loving someone.

Eleven Minutes by Paulo Cohelo, the crux of the book is that the world revolves around something that takes only eleven minutes.

I would not say that the book cements my belief but the question in my mind still remains the same:

Does it all boil down to the human touch at the end , is it what we all are living for ???